Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Chicken Lamar

After dodging Arlene and recovering from a near death by barbeque, we're back from Memphis. Frankly, I can get fine barbeque in Kingston but the Commisary in Germantown just has an air about it that has to be experienced, "Honey, now don't it?"

While we were gone all kinds of fun things happened back home. They arrested the usual suspects in a fighting chicken round up over there in the next county, which I can hit with a rock from the lower deck. Rhea County takes artillery fire from the boy's potato gun on a regular basis but it is still standing in its role as a bastion of studied ignorance.

You can even get a degree in ignorance over there from Bryan College.

"Our major objective is to provide strong and rigorous academic courses that are integrated with Biblical truth without compromising the content of our courses. We provide courses exploring various theories of evolution and creation in the courses, Origins and History of Life."

That is from the prospectus for a Biology degree. It is right below the bible verse that Creationism is based on, Colosians 1:16-17, which esentially says "god did it, and that's all you need to know."

I had hoped that when Lamar Alexander got elected, he might be the moderate Republican senator from Tennessee, since our other one, Frist, got stolen by right wing foam at the mouth FundXtian, James Dobson. Tennessee ought to have two senators like the constitution says...not right now though.

Tennessee has a racist component, in addition to enjoying watching chickens try to kill each other. On Martin Luther King's birthday, Someone in a pickup truck with over large tires will drive around with a confederate flag sticking out of the back. Highway 70 from Crossville to Kingston is the traditional route. It used to be that the racist vote went Democratic, but when Johnson signed the civil rights act, the racists decided to join the right wing nut jobs who were forming a coalition with the fascists and calling themselves conservatives, which has a better ring to it than "Racist". Then they took over an occaisionally decent and respectable political party that was in need of a bully to lead it. They made a bunch of deals with the media, who used to be in charge of telling the truth and giving us the facts so that George Bush's war record where he stayed drunk and didn't show up, somehow got to be better than John Kerry's war record where he voluteered to lead a Swift boat and used an M16 to shoot back at people who were shooting at him and still has shrapnel in his knee.

So back to the racist thing...The Senate of the United States, having taken care of all other meaningful business, decided to vote on a resolution condeming the lynching of black people. Now in order to get a resolution against lynchin Black people passed, it had to be introduced in the middle of the night when Orin Hatch, Trent Lott, and John Sununu would be sleeping or whatever it is they do in the middle of the night.

They are not vampires, at least in the traditional sense, because they have been spotted in the sunlight, but I have never seen their reflections in a mirror so it must still be counted as a possibility.

Well it turns out that the resolution got passed unanimously by a voice vote of all six senators who were there, putting the Senate of the United States on record as being against the lynching of Black people. When the other senators got in the next day and found out what had happened, all of them who felt like they had better let the world know that they too were against the lynching of Black People, signed on as cosponsors to the resolution...

Except for those Senators who are so indebted to their racist base that they cannot even for a minute be associated with a resolution against the lynching of Black People. There are sixteen of them, and for cripes sake, even Zell Miller cosponsored the resolution against the lynching of Black People, but in addition to Orin Hatch, Trent Lott, and John Sununu, you know who else hadn't signed as of lunch time Tuesday?

Lamar Alexander, the only Senator Tennessee has left.

Lamar,

I know you hate environmentalists because they want to ruin your mountain views with windmills, but this racist thing...Dude, this looks really bad to the rest of the whole danged world. Don't you think you ought to come out publicly against the LYNCHING of BLACK PEOPLE?

And by the way...sorry about them confiscating your chickens.

Peace,

Steve

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