Saturday, April 07, 2007

Saturday Funnies

Hey, we all need a laugh right? And I have my Mom in law visiting and the septic tank picked good friday to go all impacted and I can't get it pumped until when? I mean if you have to go in the woods you go in the woods, right? that's why we live in the country.

And why is it a mark of civilization that we crap INSIDE the house? 'Splain that one to me, eh? What moron thought that one up? Would whoever it is like to come over and help rip the carpet out of the basement?

So I'm busy today, looking for the drawing of my septic system that I filed somewhere 14 years ago because it's a long weekend and everybody else is working but not County Government.

Then I have to dig a hole.

You know, for eight years I lived without indoor plumbing, and at this particular moment I'm wondering why I ever changed? I got civilized and that might have been a mistake, and yes, I know that some of you will debate whether I ever actually did get civilized, but in that regard I will simply point out that there are four bathrooms inside...INSIDE...this house. I now have a hot tub outside but not one functioning outhouse, other than the one Mom nature has provided since time began.

We should always listen to our Mom. She's saying something about climate change right this very minute. We should start listening or maybe things outside will quit functioning, too.

Are we laughing yet?


Now...Why do I think this one is funny?

The Republican Party is dying.

Our Constitution was written by men with a visceral distaste for religious
fanaticism. Many of those 35% of voters who still claim the Republican party are
going to change anyway as the Bush administration comes under scrutiny, but many
more will shift if an appropriately framed message is delivered.

And now...For something completely different:

You'd think the gore of Halloween, with its vampires, monsters and
horror-film killers, would mean October is high season for fake blood.

But at Performance Studios costuming shop, high season for fake blood
is right now, and the biggest buyers are churches.

"At Halloween, we sell blood by the ounce. At Easter,
we sell blood by the gallon
," says Gary Broadrick, owner of Performance

And now...for something even differenter:

Why is there a Soccer ball in this picture?

Or for that matter, why is there a picture in that picture?


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