Friday, May 14, 2004

The one eyed man is king

Well, I woke up this morning and wondered if we had pulled out of Iraq yet. Then I found out that Rummy has solved the problem caused by all those pictures of American debauchery and torture of Iraqi prisoners...he banned cameras! There, you see how simple that was? No pictures, no problem!

I heard a former interrogator on a conservative show say that he was always taught that you didn't torture people because you just got bad intelligence. They'll say whatever you want them to in order to get you to stop. You know what that means, don't you? Those folks weren't being tortured to find out anything useful. The Guards were just plain mean and perverted!

Would you be interested in the actual number of arrests we have made in Iraq? I was kind of shocked....43,000! Of which, the Red Cross says 90% were mistakes. I guess we tortured them just to make sure they wouldn't confess to anything we didn't know about. Never can be too sure, you know.

Rumsfeld trained under Richard Nixon and knows that Nixon's only mistake was in not burning the tapes that proved he violated the Constitution. Rummy is not going to make the same mistakes...I don't mean he won't violate the Constitution, He'll just be a lot better at getting rid of the evidence.

That's why Rummy will have all the digital cameras confiscated. We'll see.

Now all he has left to do is get the Iraqis to love us and install a nice democracy of lackeys who will sell their oil only to Rummy's associates. I hope this happens soon so we can get back to fighting the war on Terror. I'm worried about something happening. it would be too convenient for Bush and Rummy if we had a major "event" just before the election.

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