Monday, January 31, 2005

Watermelon wars

Lots of you responded with stories about homemade "cough syrup":

My grandfather always had moonshine a with rock candy, on a string, available for all ailments. Pretty good stuff from what I remember. He always had a dozen or more mason jars full, a few under the sink, and lots more up in the attic. Lot's of illness in Georgia back in those days!


I had forgotten about "rock candy". What I remember was left in the bottom of a can of cane syrup. which is pronounced "Surp", by the way. When Dad would make pancakes on Saturday morning, my brother and I would peer into the half gallon can that cane syrup came in to see if any rock candy was forming on the bottom.

Joe and I grew up about an hour from each unbeknownst to the other.

(got that?)

Well actually, neither one of us has grown all the way up, so far, but we pretend. Moonshine whiskey and kerosene cured many an ill for our predecessors. Way too cheap, though...not enough money went to big Pharma so they had to invent antibiotics and start the bacteriological arms race against the human race. Are we winning, or not? Hard to tell.

Speaking of morons...(OK, I wasn't but I am, starting now.) Our local state senator says he's a Democrat. He campaigned as pro gun, anti government, pro life, anti gay, and pro war. He ran a little to the right of the Republican. This last week he came out publicly urging the Democratic National Party not to choose Howard Dean as chairman because it would alienate Southern Democrats.

"It would prompt many Southern Democrats to abandon the party," is what he said. Where the heck else can I go, you idiot? You are already agianst danged near everything I hold dear, Senator, and you think Howard Dean is the one alienating Democrats?

I realize my state senator is probably unemployable in the private sector and needs this job, but why in the heck does he want to come out against the only Democarat with national stature who says, "We need the South!"

The Democratic Party has moved rightward for the last four election cycles and they got their asses kicked, so...Hey, I've got a great idea on how to save the party...Let's move more to the right! We can be pro torture, racist, anti gay, lie about everything going to hell in a handbasket, fiscally, environmentally, and socially, and we can help construct the meanest damned culture the world has ever known based on the writings of Benito Mussolini and Machievelli, and every body can go to the Southern Baptist Church of their choice and it will all be good...





And now for your moment of Zen, thanks to Pat. This is a carved watermelon. Why didn't we think of carving them like this when I was a kid? All we did was steal them out of fields and throw the leftovers at each other in watermelon wars...

Go here, take the time to let it load, and listen to the music.


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